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  • Writer's pictureLama Jigme Gyatso

Making Wise Decisions

A good hearted individual

being harangued

by their parents

to seek marriage,

when they desired none.

sought my guidance.

And in the annoying manner

of many Lamas

I shall address

the larger questions

inferred, but NOT asked….

from the point of view

of evolutionary


as children

our survival

could have depended

upon our

unquestioning obedience

to our parents.

But just as Younglings,

become Padawans,

who become Jedi Knights

who become Jedi Masters

likewise, it is the way of nature

that children,

grow into adolescents,

who grow into adults.

And adults who persist

in blind obedience

to their parents

are NOT truly adults

BUT merely

very large children.



shows us

that it is during


when healthy individuals


from obedient children

into independent adults.

This transition

is difficult,

fraught with danger

and could often

be quite ugly.

For evolution selects

only for survival

and reproduction

and for neither


NOR happiness.

About two thousand

years ago

a Jewish tent maker wrote:

When I was a child,

I talked like a child,

I thought like a child

I reasoned like a child…

when I became an adult,

I put childish ways

behind me.

Likewise we must evolve

beyond blind obedience

until we are secure

in our independence.

As adults

negotiating our journeys

through life

there will be many

offering us

unsolicited advice.

Many of whom

will strive

to assure us

that they have

our happiness

at heart.


could even

mean it.

But when our parents

reach a certain age

no matter how rational

they may appear

certain evolutionary pressures

drive them

like tooth paste shot out

of a as squeezed tube

thus they are driven

to coerce their offspring

to produce grandchildren.

And as such,

the words and actions they take

to persuade their children…

are less driven

by love and wisdom…

than they are driven

by impulse and cleverness:

both venal and ruthless.


no matter how much

they claim to love us…

are NOT

a guaranteed source

of wisdom.

This leads us

to the pressing question

and the subject of this moment’s


How are we to make


that are truly wise?”

From the point of view

of Lao Tzu’s treatise

The Book of the Beneficial Way

or Tao Te Ching

if you prefer Chinese,

the key to a life:

meaningful and fulfilling,

is to flow from a state

of centered spontaneity

like the fictitious

Qui Gon Jinn

who trusted his intuition,

went on a side quest

and discovered

the chosen one;

and who also advised

I counsel patience

the solution

will present itself.”

It is folly to make decisions

from a place

of impulsive scatteredness…

far better, it is,

to make decisions

from a place

of peaceful centeredness.

It is also folly

to make decisions

from a place of cold logic

as humans are far more

that merely our

prefrontal cortexes

for we have mid-brains

and brain-stems

all three of which

must be reconciled

if we are to know peace,

and fulfillment, and joy.

Rather than computing


from the logic of contrivance

it far is better to do so

from a place of



NOT from the scattered


of fools,

like that so-called

“good idea”

one gets

after their fifth

shot of Tequila…

BUT rather

from the centered


that is the by product

of an effective

meditation practice.

NO, Neither concentration

Nor the suppression of thought

for those will only multiply

our anxiety and aggression

BUT rather the Buddha’s meditation

that watches the play of mind

and relaxes into

mind’s NON-graspable nature.

When this is properly learned

and practiced every morning

and every evening

we, like Qui Gon Jinn,

could intuit

how to side step

the manipulative tendencies

of those

who think they love us

all the while

understanding the folly

of appealing to the reason

of those driven

by primal impulses

beyond their comprehension

and instead,

we could flow

from the wisdom that rejects

the folly of the extrinsic motivations

that seek external reward and approval

and flow from the wisdom

that also rejects

the selfishness of the intrinsic motivation

that longs for the opiates

of our internal reward centers

and the self-satisfaction it feeds

BUT instead we could embody

the wisdom that flows

from a place of A-trinsic motivation

where there is NEITHER


NOR agenda

BUT rather

the limitless peace

of the centered spontaneity

that has been so mastered

that one practices it

spontaneously, and habitually,

and easily, and effectively.

This is why we practice

the Buddha’s contemplation

and compassion

that we

like Qui Gon Jinn

might meditate

like a Jedi.

Let us conclude

with a simple

call to action

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